Happy No Matter What


On Forgiveness

I had the opportunity to review Walter E. Jacobson’s Forgive to Win for his book launch today. It’s a thought provoking little book that got me thinking a lot about the concept of forgiveness. Forgiveness  a Path to Self-love? Since self-love is often a huge challenge for many of my clients, I found Jacobson’s take [...]

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1. You think you can read minds. I believe telepathy exists. One time my husband touched my back and the word “courage” popped into my head. I asked him what he was thinking at the time and he said, “be brave.” But that’s about it for me when it comes to psychic experience. Yet back [...]


The Rules

In our culture, we have unspoken “rules” when it comes to emotions… It’s okay to cry in public as long as you’re at a funeral (but not too loudly). It’s fine to be sad as long as you’ve suffered some obvious and appropriate loss (but get it together already will you?!) Crying at weddings is [...]

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How to Handle Criticism

Last week I took my kids to a preschool event at Oaks Park where for $6 they got to ride the frog hopper and drive the kiddie cars to their hearts content. At the end of the event there was a massive story hour (picture 300 preschool kids, a swarm of guardians, one dairy princess [...]


An Open Letter to An Approval Addict

You don’t know what you want. You won’t know until you face the fact you have a problem. Emotional eaters struggle with extra weight. Alcoholics deal with blackouts and hangovers. Smokers smell bad and cough. Gamblers lose money. But, you… You’re just stuck. You decided to be a lawyer because dad wanted you to be [...]


On Being Hot…

Ladies I’m talking about the social standard of “hotness.” If you live in the western world, you know it well. The airbrushed photos, the too thin frames, the big boobs, the perfectly proportioned eyes, lips and nose. I used to buy into it hook, line and sinker. I used to run fast in order to [...]


I have had a life long love of “gold stars.” The gold star was the most sought after in elementary school.  I wanted to win every spelling bee and ace every times table. My love for gold stars morphed into a passion for any kind of recognition. I chased after the elusive presidential fitness award, [...]


Why Approval Seeking Makes You Stupid

“We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”– Albert Einstein. Approval Seeking. The truth is everyone does it. The desire to belong is primal. Brene Brown says so, and I believe her. It’s an evolutionary thing. In the days when we lived in caves, staying on [...]


The World Needs You

“Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” [...]


That Was Then. This Is Now.

I used to want to lose weight. It didn’t matter how much I weighed. I always wanted to lose a few more pounds. I thought other people were nicer to me when I was thin. Now I’m at my natural weight. I got there by treating myself nice. (And who wants to be around someone [...]