“The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you’re uncool.” – Quote from Almost Famous

You’re probably acquainted with your inner critic or your inner child or even your inner lizard… but today I’d like to introduce you to someone else I think you ought to know.

Your inner dork.

Now some of you my scoff. You might be tempted to say, “Amy, I’m so cool I wouldn’t even use a word like ‘dork’ in the first place.” Okay okay okay. You can call her your inner nerd if you want. Or your inner loser if that works.

But she’s in there. I’ll tell you how to find her. She’s the one you hide. In fact, she embarrasses the hell out of you. You work really hard to make sure nobody knows about her.

You are ashamed of her.

If anybody finds out about her, you’re convinced they’ll learn the “truth” about you. That you’re hopelessly incompetent. Never to be trusted. Doomed to a life of ostracism and social rejection.

So you work really hard to be the opposite of your inner dork.

Let me give you a real life example…

Meet my inner dork:

She’s not very articulate, in fact, she stutters and often has trouble remembering the correct word. She enjoys watching reality TV (Survivor, Sister Wives or John and Kate Plus 8 are some of her favs). She’s not into personal hygiene – she doesn’t shave her legs or armpits, forgets to wear deodorant and often neglects to floss. She listens to Barbara Streisand and Duncan Sheik. She loves to shake it hard in Zumba class (and has almost mastered the shoulder shimmy). She doesn’t care about foreign policy, current events or the price of gasoline. She picks food off of other people’s plates (and sometimes off the floor). She drinks a little too much wine. She calls to her children very loudly to “get back here!” while not budging from the Santa line. She falls for the free ipad scam. She can never seem to remember how to spell the word “exercise” or “practice” (thank God for spell check). And she can be pretty whiny and hypocritical.

I used to go to a lot of trouble hiding my inner dork.

And in my life I became the opposite. All of this took a lot of work. I graduated at the top of my class as a masters student and even became a policy research analyst. Not only did I read about current events, at one point I think I was receiving The Oregonion, The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal. And as for the rest of it, let’s just say I was exceptionally well groomed and well behaved.

Yes, I used to hide my inner dork, and if anyone ever accused me of being anything like her, I would fly of the handle. But I wasn’t able to see how beautiful she really is. She’s funny, interesting, creative, spontaneous, unique. And life is an adventure being her. It’s true, I’m still whiny and a touch of a hypocrite at times and people often don’t take kindly to loud mouthed moms in the Santa line but I’m working it out.

I take pride in my inner dork!

Here are two reasons why you should too:

1. There’s nothing wrong with you.

So you have flaws? Maybe you’re even whiny or hypocritical or mean-spirited on occasion. Think about the people in your life who you love. Chances are you forgive them their flaws. When you become willing to see these “flaws,” you might even cut yourself some slack. Instead of resisting or denying your imperfections, try accepting them.

2. There’s something beautiful about you.

Probably quite a few beautiful things about you. Beautiful things that up until now, you weren’t able to see because you were so busy hiding your inner dork.


Related posts:


3 Responses

  1. Michelle Reinhardt says:

    Love this Amy! Great class today–so eye opening and super helpful.

  2. Amy says:

    Thanks Michelle! So fun to have you!

  3. Linda Ursin says:

    Thanks for posting this. Growing up as an outsider taught me never to hide who I am. I’m going by the ‘take it or leave it’ approach, always being me.

Leave a Reply to Amy